Remembering . . .

A year ago today we were finally united with our dear Arsema. What a bittersweet day it was. Our precious girl was less than excited about everything that was happening. I will never forget holding her stiff, scared body. We wanted so much for her to know there was nothing to fear. That process would take weeks for her. It definitely didn't come overnight. You can read all about that on the blog we kept to record our journey to her. However, a year later, she is deeply connected to her family and thriving. She is an absolute joy. We are so thankful for all the Lord has done in bringing her into our family.

Currently we are in the midst of an attack of the Chicken Pox. Three boys down, two girls likely waiting their turn. Hopefully all will be well soon and we can get onto better things ... like celebrating Nathaniel & Colton's birthdays!

A Year Ago . . .

Wow ... so it's been a year ago now (and a few days) since we got that infamous call! The time had come and our baby girl was revealed to us. The Lord had been preparing our hearts for her what seemed like forever. We will never forget seeing her first photos and hearing her story. The shock ... the sadness ... the overwhelming hope and joy.

What a long journey you have had, precious child, in your first two years of life. Many difficulties, losses and trials . . . yet your heavenly Father loves you SO MUCH and by His grace made a way to provide a family for you. Oh what a privilege it is, precious Arsema to be your family. You are a beautiful reflection of God's grace.

Gone are the days of being weak and ill and tiny. You are now strong and full of energy. Your vocabulary is just exploding and it is so much fun to hear you learning to build sentences. You're a bit sneaky and beginning to be quite mischievous. Just this week as you found sister's gum (in the trash can!) and quickly hid it away safely between your chomping teeth you said to me .... "Gum ... mmmmmmm ... yummy ... Mommy!!". I could do nothing but laugh and let you enjoy your rescued treat. Silly girl!!

There are times you still get confused and scared and far away ... especially during our recent move. Those painful expressions of yours take me back to our first days together in your home land. More often though your eyes just sparkle and light up with wonder as you explore and take in all the amazing discoveries in this world.

You are so loved, my precious child. I will never forget God's relentless urging in my spirit about you. It seemed impossible that He would lead us to adopt again. By all realistic standards it was just kind of over-the-top. Oh but the Lord has NO limits, my child. He is ABLE to walk us through any mountains we face. I am so glad He led us to you. Through this journey I have learned so much about His heart and what He values.

May the Lord continue to work through your life just as He has ordained.

More Birthday pics

Since blogger and I aren't getting along very well, here is another post with more pics from the birthday time! :) As you can see, progress is being made on the house! We'll update photos here soon.

Happy Birthday, Maleah!

It's hard to believe that Maleah has already turned 2! Between working on some molars and coming down with a cold, the birthday girl wasn't so happy. But she sure did enjoy some presents, cake and cousin time! She has not been a big fan of this move and getting her little world turned upside down again. Thankfully, things are beginning to settle down and she's learning that we are here to STAY and we're not leaving her. We look forward to another wonderful year with this precious sweetie.

And since Blogger isn't cooperating with me, there'll be a separate post with more pics.

Problems!!

I'm sorry that you're getting an error when you try to leave comments! Be assured we DO get your comments, but since our email has changed it sends this "unable to deliver" message. If any of you can tell me how to change my primary email on blogger, we'd love to hear from you!!! ... before I take the saw to my computer!!

But PLEASE still leave comments!! We LOVE hearing from you!

Thanks!

Much progress being made on the house ... LOTS of tools everywhere. Falling plaster has been removed, walls repaired and fresh paint put on. Stress has been felt with all the craziness. Children needing structure. Job search still in progress. Much prayer needed. Gratefulness has been felt in abundance while experiencing God's wonderful mercy and love throughout this move. BIRTHDAY to be celebrated soon!!! .... so come back for pics after the weekend. :)

Blessings!,
The Roberts Family

Trust ... sometimes a difficult thing

As I somewhat anticipated, this move has been a difficult one for Arsema. Our mostly carefree little girl has temporarily transformed once again into a frightened wee-one with her guard way up. She looks at me as though I’ve let her down. We worked so long and hard to build trust with her and this set-back hit me hard emotionally. And while I would not choose for her to go through this, the Lord is definitely working through it and teaching me even greater lessons about Him.

When I look into her eyes and see that stare of confusion I have to ask myself ….. is this what I look like when looking to my heavenly Father during times of difficulty and unknown. Does my guard go up when I don’t know what’s coming next? Does my anxiety level rise when my routine is broken? Oh you betcha! I sense the Lord whispering to my spirit these last weeks and months …. “My child, don’t you know that you can TRUST ME?! Haven’t I proven to you over and over again that I WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU?! My word says that I WILL NEVER leave you or forsake you! …. Do you really believe me? I have been there with you every step of this journey, none of that has changed!” But my flesh and my weakness seep out at times and I give in to fear and I’m tempted to believe the lies of the enemy.

The Lord is so KIND and MERCIFUL. He does not hold office hours. He is readily available to us every single moment, if we’ll just look to HIM and embrace Him with arms open wide. I’ve had to ask myself a lot this last year what is it that keeps me from embracing Him! Often it is the fear of the unknown. At those times I’m challenged to take a look at His character. What I am coming to realize is that He is worthy of our absolute trust!!! He longs for His children to be completely, whole-heartily surrendered to Him.

I find myself doing lots and lots of reassuring with Arsema these days. Doing my best to meet her where she is, which is a bit regressed from where she was. I’ve been working to connect with her, seeking frequent eye-contact, maintaining limits so she feels safe and secure. Over and over again the Lord gently reminds me ….. this is what I’m doing with you, my child! I long for your COMPLETE trust. I want you to look to me, not with eyes of fear, but eyes full of vibrancy because you are SO familiar with me and my ways that you just trust me no matter where I take you!
I find myself trying to prove to my daughter that she can really trust me!, that I have her very BEST in mind, that I work to meet her needs. But you see, with the Lord it’s all been proven long, long ago. Unlike me with all my sin and selfish desires and inadequacies, the Lord has NO limits. He is the perfect example of a parent. He proved it all when He chose to die for me so that I might enjoy eternity with Him. Thinking about what He’s done for me, spurs me on to surrender, obedience and walking in truth. Oh that He would take out the yuck in my heart and life so that I can better serve Him and my family.

I look forward to the days to come, knowing with some extra work, patience and time, our precious Arsema will let her guard down and flourish once again. Soon her anger will give way to laughter more frequently and she’ll have figured out that we’re all still here and while her life got shook up yet again, she’s gonna be okay. How I long for her to grow up to know and understand her Heavenly Father’s love. What a privilege it is to walk this journey of life with her, even during her very grumpy moments.

Change does not come without pain. Even good change causes stress and anxiety. But as I’m learning day by day, the Lord can be trusted with every detail. Selling a house, securing a job, and raising support for a new ministry …. The Lord is in control of all of it. HE is the one who will make it all come to be, we need to focus on surrender and obedience each day, moment by moment.

Time to Hit the Road

A lot could be said about how moving is like labor! I had long, long hard labors. In the midst of it, I wanted to never endure them again. Yet later, it's like the weight of the difficult part of it had faded and I was left with focusing on the many blessings. Well ..... moving .... while fighting off a flu virus would rank right up there for me!

Many of you have prayed for us these last days as we not only learned we'd be moving soon, but then found out in was in a matter of days! We are SO very grateful for your prayers!!! Yesterday, I hardly had strength to walk around for very long .... yet tonight we're preparing to be on the road early in the morning. Oh how we'd appreciate you praying with us as we travel!!

As we sat around tonight trying to establish our game plan for the morning, I posed the question to our kids .... how many pizzas do you think we served in this kitchen? It was fun to hear their guesses. Some of you know that our current home was a huge work in progress. The kitchen was the major focus of renovation. We loved having company over and making home-made pizzas while chatting with them and learning of what God was doing in their lives. SO many memories in this kitchen.

When listing our house with a local realtor she was commenting to David that a marriage only withstands a certain number of house renovations. Ha. But I hope we defy the odds, as we're embarking on yet another one in IL. Although not as extensive as here. :)

This move is one very emotional for us. We are leaving folks here that we have grown to love so deeply. Not only are we changing location, but major roles as well. In our time table we would have not had an extended stay in ND. And while it was full of some great difficulty as far as work/job went and the great unknown .... it was God's plan for our family. He taught us to trust Him and believe Him to greater depths than we've ever known. There might come a day I write more about the things He taught me through this last seven months.

Many special people await us in Illinois. Grandparents! (well one batch of them we have to wait til April to see as they don't do IL winter anymore), our dog Honey!, our church family ...... and a new house waiting and ready to be turned into a home. Still many details to trust God about. But we are learning to trust and obey Him day to day.

Perhaps in the days to come you'll get to see some pics of our progress on the new place we call home. We look very forward to updating you also on our future ministry with the ABBA Fund. Be sure to check out their blog, written by Jason Kovacs, for many helpful resources concerning adoption and orphan care.

North Dakota holds special memories for us as well, because this is where God led us to follow Him on our adoption journeys. We saw Him move mountains time and again for each one. Now as a family of 7 we embark on this new chapter.